When I was a little girl… 6 or 7 maybe, My beloved grandmother used to cart me off to church with her for this meeting or that. I remember being there when the women would gather together in groups of 4 or 5 dressed in amazing clothes with amazing hair and amazing ideas and Amazing, amazing hats.
Of course that was in the early 70’s, they dont wear big hats anymore, but I have always called them the big hat ladies since then. Those beautifully classy girls with the ability to make things utterly beautiful and warm. These women were the women that created the beautiful flower arrangements at church, made the table settings look amazing at the pot luck dinners, made everything beautiful and smell wonderful and feel like you were being pampered and loved. They wanted the best and got it in all that they did. No half way marks. Classy and completely put together. Every thing they touched turned to a dreamlike Better Homes and Gardens display and they knew how to throw a party. I so wanted to be just like them when I grew up and I spent many hours in my grandmothers pine room looking through hats and silk dresses and amazing shoes. I guess I thought that I could absorb the big hatness.
My grandmother was a big hat lady. My sister is a big hat lady, I have a daughter and an aunt that are big hat ladies. I have friends that are big hat ladies. Our pastors wife is a big hat lady. And I adore my big hat friends with all my heart. In fact, I tried to be a big hat lady…. But it never happened. For all my ranting and complaining about living out here with Cowboy and all the fits about coffee shops and book stores and mud… this is where I belong… Ankle deep in the poo and the open space, running my fingers through the locks of the llamas and the sheep dreaming of how to create the next woolen thing.
I aint no Big Hat Lady.
My grandma tried to train me up like this, But if it’s not in your blood it’s just not. While she was creating floral displays and sewing dresses for church I was playing the drums and hanging out at the river learning to fish with my mom … who aint no Big Hat Lady.
Grandma sent me to singing lessons and taught me about manners and how to set a proper table and she tried to teach me to be lady like. She insisted that I dress for dinner,sit properly, not say inappropriate things, wash my elbows and comb my hair … I just wanted to go fishing.
I am a stomp. A stomp is a person who does not think in floral arrangements and detail but rather in the mission of getting whatever it is done so she can get to the art table or the river or to her beloved llamas or horses or kids…. and take them fishing or rock hounding.
A stomp builds the altar out of the power tools she got for Christmas, the big hat decorates it and makes sure that everyone behaves properly.
A big hat spends weeks creating a live nativity scene with live people…. A stomp buys a blow up baby Jesus at the Wal-Mart.
A BIG HAT uses linens, stomp uses paper.
A big hat brings a chocolate delight that took her 4 hours in the kitchen to prepare to the pot luck.. a stomp brings a bucket of chicken.
Big hat: list maker, Stomp: makes it up as she goes-
Big hat: detail oriented.- OCD Stomp: goal oriented, messy, makes piles.
A stomp wears sneakers or boots, a big hat lady wears a perfectly put together outfit that can transition from soccer mom to meeting worthy the second it is required. A stomp would have to go home and change first.
Get the poo off her boots
If you catch me on Sunday morning on my way to church. You can see my grandmothers influence. I will be dressed in a dress with properly matching adornments and shoes. It was the way I was raised. But know that the second worship is over I am thinking to myself …. I cannot wait to get out of this ridiculous bra and into my wonder woman t-shirt and llama pajama bottoms so I can go out and visit my baby donkey who mind you, does not know that she is a donkey and will sit right on my lap if I sit down.
You can put lipstick on a pig,,, but it’s still a pig.
Just a quick note… I do have a few friends (K, T, L) and a daughter that I call hybrids.
HYBRID: function in both areas.. a big hat stomp is versatile and is quiet handy to have around and quite a lot of fun. They are necessary for the big hat stomp balance.
I was recently in a situation where I knew that I was totally out of my league… big hat wise. It was a lot like calling a surgeon and getting a garbage collector. I was so far out of my element that 30 seconds before I walked in the room I thought I knew what i was doing.. sure and confident. 30 seconds later I realized that the only thing i knew for sure was that I was so glad I did not bring the beer can Christmas tree. Thank you Lord I could not find it. 10 years ago I would have been mortified, but because of my hybrid friends, I was able to laugh and to see that when you step out of the plan God has for you and venture out on your own, it never goes well. I had heard loud and clear what my plan and mission was and it had nothing to do with this. But I, proud and sure, ignored what God told me to do and like dominos… it all fell around me. Thank you God for allowing me to laugh about this and not dig a hole to crawl in. What a beautiful lesson though…to be mindful of the things that God gives you to do and not venture out on your own strength. Especially when it’s His show. Thank you KC for teaching me that this week. I love you!
Another thing I learned is that when the big hats and the stomps work together, it is beautiful. Friendships are forged, hearts are mended and laughter is abundant.
I shall let the big hat ladies do their big hat things and I will do mine always mindful of the strengths and talents that each possess and the magic of the Big Hat Ladies to create beauty in a scary, dark world.
It’s best to leave that beauty work to the experts and keep my beer can Christmas tree to myself.
My Big hat Sister is coming to visit me at my Stomp house soon. Cant wait to torture her.