Today was sheep wrestling day. I don’t know if I can express this story in words but I am going to try.
Before I go any further, let me say that to those of you who live with sheep, you may not find this as
pinteresting interesting as those of us who are new to the sheep wrestling game, unless of course you read this and think to your self ” Her particular sheep has some sort of emotional disorder that needs to be addressed”. Please say so because I don’t know what is appropriate behavior for a sheep.
I do know that Buttercup hates Cowboy. She becomes alarmed at his very presence. I have no doubt that it has something to do with him cramming her in the bed of a pickup and taking her away from her lambs who were still nursing. Of course in all fairness, they were like teenagers in sheep time and needed to cut the apron strings . But again, I don’t know what is appropriate sheep behavior.
I have taken special care to make friends with this sheep, feeding her apples and carrots and special sheep feed each day. But I just could not get the idea out of my head that I had to touch that wool. I had to feel it in my hands so that I could further nurture my sick obsession with this fiber/fabric/ creation. She likes me. This sheep and I have developed a relationship. We are friends.
I decided that it could not be that hard. I told Cowboy I was going in there, in that pen, to wrestle that sheep to the ground. I watched all the you tube videos and read the book and If I could get that sheep to sit on her butt… she’d let me pet her and she would submit to anything I wanted to do to her. I had to touch that wool.
He laughed at me in that way that a parent laughs at a small child who says they are going to be an astronaut or a Pole dancer when they grow up. He grinned as if I just told him that I was going to work in the white house as the commander-in-chief.
That ticked me off.
But Cowboy knows me. And he knows that I will do it. Even if it’s stupid. So he agreed to help me. I went into the pen first with a can of feed and fed her from my hand. But then it happened. Cowboy came into the pen.
I dont really know how to explain what happened next, but I will start by saying that I never saw one video that said sheep could fly. But they do.
She began to dash around that pen at incredible speeds and I swear I could hear the music from the wizard of oz when the witch was riding her broom. She began to circle the pen and as Cowboy turned his back to close the gate, that sheep made an 8 foot leap into my 6 foot tall husband and I could not get the words out of my mouth in time.
Then it was as if the gates of hell opened up in that pen and i was in the middle of it, holding a can of feed, praying to my savior to intervene as the two of them proceeded to engage in a contest that could rival Blue and Paul Bunyan. Hay, dirt, poop and plant matter filled the air as if tornadoes and hurricanes had entered into it. She went one way and I went the other. He went the other way and I hurdled a fence as it rained sweet feed and carrots. I tried to grab for her as she made another pass but she flew again up and this time so did he and they landed in a pile on the ground with cowboy on top. He cussed. I forgave him.
Heavy breathing, swear words, snot and breath flying….. My handsome husband wrestled that angry beast to the ground.
And I did the only thing I could do. I walked over, squatted down and
Felt up that sheep. It was glorious.